almost one year ago.

one year ago i was ecstatic that we would be expecting again. on 10/29/11 my world came crashing down. 
we lost the baby. i was 13 weeks along. 
i didn't know how i would go on.

i think about that baby and that pregnancy often and think about how i will feel come the day, one year ago, when it happened. 

i have been okay and feel overjoyed with another baby boy in my belly. and feel blessed that he could even be born around that time. 
we would all have a life to celebrate.

i have been focusing so much on the new baby coming and not what happened last year. 

and then i get a hospital bill from that time last year in the mail. and make a phone call about it. 

and the tears won't stop flowing.